Outraged!

"The life of men and women is so cheap and property is so sacred! There are so many of us for one job it matters little if 146 of us are burned to death. I know from my experience it is up to the working people to save themselves, and the only way is through a strong working-class movement."

A few years ago, I saw the Israeli film Sentenced To Marriage which documents the stories and experiences of agunot, Jewish women whose husbands refuse to grant them a get (divorce contract) leaving them as "chained wives." It was rather sobering to learn about these women (religious and secular alike) whose self-determination is trumped by oppressive men, and falls prey to the less-than-sympathetic judgments of the rabbinical high court.

There has been a recent flurry of attention to the issue of boys’ (and men’s) flagging participation in Jewish life, particularly in the synagogue -- some going so far as to call this a crisis.

I’ve never met Lorraine Rothman, a women’s health activist and inventor of the Del’Em menstrual extraction kit. But I came to know her work through my dissertation research, and so I was deeply saddened to hear that she is dying.

Rothman was an early leader of the self-help health movement, a phenomenon of early 1970s women’s liberation that involved groups of women using a speculum to look at each other’s cervixes. Think of it as a physical complement to consciousness-raising, a way for women to gain knowledge and authority about their own bodies. Instead of relying on a gynecologist (usually male, at that time) to tell us about the health or sickness of our bodies, women would be able to help each other know their bodies from the inside out, literally.

In 1971, Lorraine Rothman and Carol Downer traveled around the country with a slide presentation and bags of speculum to teach women about the art of what they called “self-help,” sparking the creation of “self-help clinics” as they went. Rothman then invented the Del’Em (basically a soft plastic tube and vacuum jar), which self-help groups could learn to use to remove the contents of the uterus on the day menstruation began or was expected. This process of “menstrual extraction” was touted as a way to liberate women from the inconveniences of menstruation. It could also be used as a method of very early abortion. This procedure offered another way for women to use technology to take an active, cooperative role in the workings of their own bodies.

Though self-help and menstrual extraction is all but forgotten, Rothman was a key figure in the development of feminist health care, co-founding several feminist women’s health centers. It is sad and ironic, then, that she is now fatally ill because of the failure of her own health care. She is dying of advanced, metastasized bladder cancer, which was not detected by the doctors she saw through her HMO over the past two years of her pelvic pain. She did not see a urologist, because her HMO did not offer the option of seeing a female doctor. A physician’s assistant at a women’s health center finally detected that she had a serious problem, but while Rothman waited for an appointment with a uro-gynecologist through her HMO, her pain became unbearable and a visit to the emergency room diagnosed her advanced cancer. She is now in hospice care.

Her story proves that we still have a long way to go to create a health care system that is responsive and accessible to all patients, providing services that meet their needs and earn their trust. With feminist health care centers like those Rothman helped create now on the wane, many women like her (and others, such as transfolk) with reason to distrust the medical establishment, are falling through the gaping health care cracks. Rothman may have been utopian in thinking that viewing the cervix with a group of women friends could change the world, but we would do well to ask ourselves: where is empowerment and self-determination in health care today?

While Hadassah, Jewish Women International, and the National Council for Jewish Women were busy weighing-in on the HPV vaccination debate (see February’s blog entry: “HPV Vaccinations: Choice or Mandate?”) the Orthodox Union (OU) has been firing its way into sexual health rhetoric by launching its own take on the “abstinence only” movement; a movement which has been dominated by the Christian Right. The OU now stands proudly behind the First Abstinence Website for Jewish Teens. A project of Negiah.org -- a “proud affiliate for The Abstinence Clearinghouse” -- and NCSY, the Orthodox Union’s Youth Group, “First Abstinence Website for Jewish Teens” brings abstinence to a whole new level of restriction.

Now, if the website and its sponsors explicitly framed abstinence (including abstaining from physical contact with someone of the opposite sex until marriage) as a religious choice supported by an interpretation of halachah (Jewish law) that would be a legitimate position, worthy of respect. But they don’t do that. Instead, they frame sexual intimacy and sexual contact as a kind of social evil. The website content is disturbing -- chock-full of shady statistics, unsubstantiated “facts,” and preposterous scare-tactics such as: “Sexually active girls are THREE TIMES more likely to attempt suicide; sexually active boys are EIGHT TIMES more likely...” Does the OU provide a source for this? Of course not. And how about this: “Over 25% of sexually active teenage girls report that they are depressed all or most of the time. Less than 8% of girls who are not sexually active are depressed all or most of the time.”

The site also reminds us that “teens -- especially girls -- may need many things, emotionally. They can use approval, validation, commitment and intimacy. But don’t confuse being intimate emotionally with being intense physically!” It goes on to remind us that unlike dogs, lions, or lowland gorillas, we humans can weigh our choices and control our urges, which, according to this website, means that instead of expressing love and affection through a hug or a kiss (only with someone of the opposite sex, of course!) we should just enjoy a walk, go bowling, or watch television together. Aren’t those alternatives (not to intercourse, but to hugging and kissing) just so… enticing? I’d never thought of bowling as such a deeply affectionate activity. Clearly, I haven’t been thinking outside the box.

And then, of course, there’s the section entitled “Condoms are NOT the Answer!” which is full of… wisdom.

With so many Jewish organizations and health professionals speaking out against the dangers of pro-abstinence tactics, and with countless Jewish women who have been pioneers in reproductive rights, sexual freedom, and birth control—Emma Goldman, Laurie Schwab Zabin, and Nancy Miriam Hawley among them—one would think that all segments of the Jewish community -- regardless of religious practice -- would be providing Jewish youth with information to help them make informed choices with regard to sexual health, rather than offering “alternatives” that could potentially tempt Jewish youth into unsafe practices. As the “abstinence only” movement creeps its way back into public schools and other childhood education programs (in my public high school’s “Family Life Education” class—“Sex Ed” was too “risky” a name— the most celebrated form of birth control after abstinence was the Rhythm Method…) it’s quite alarming that the Orthodox Union is joining these forces. Who’s ready to launch the first sexual health website for Jewish teens?

In accord with the general mania for “top ten” and “top 100” lists, the Newsweek website now offers us a “Web Exclusive” list of “The Top 50 Rabbis in America.” Woohoo!

It’s no big surprise that the three Hollywood “power brokers” who put this list together managed to find only five women who could muster the “influence” necessary for inclusion. Given the low number, however, it’s hard to avoid the suspicion that the list-makers were straining to find enough women so that they could respond to inevitable criticisms with the claim that actually 10% of their chosen rabbis were female. Interestingly Orthodox rabbis (representing about 10% of the American Jewish population) come in at almost 35% of the list.

The troubling implications of this exercise in list-making could fill another top 50 list, but let me speak here to just one central concern.

Almost thirty-five years after the ordination of the first American woman rabbi, it would be tough to argue for any more influential innovation in American Judaism than the transformation of women’s religious roles within every denomination. Surely women rabbis must have played some part in this trend. Yet, a list dominated by those who lead large institutions (both cultural and congregational) or who have a strong media presence will inevitably miss the impact of women who still have been largely excluded from Jewish mainstream institutional leadership and from leadership in the largest congregations that this list celebrates.

Changes in women’s roles and public Jewish identities have created a much different American Jewish community than that of 30 years ago. Clearly, the list’s recognition of Sharon Kleinbaum for her leadership of the world’s largest synagogue for queer Jews, and of Janet Marder and Toba Spitzer for their attainment of mainstream denominational leadership would not have been possible without that transformation. While it’s great to see them here, their inclusion fit into an old-style map of Jewish leadership that sees only big organizations and congregations. Any rabbi list that could really capture the impact and dynamic force of today’s Jewish community would inevitably include a high percentage of women.

But then again, a list might be the last place where we might expect to find that kind of rich and inclusive community represented.

Earlier this month the United Jewish Communities General Assembly (G.A.) met in Los Angeles. The G.A. offers an opportunity for Jewish professionals and lay-leaders to gather en masse to discuss a variety of important issues facing the Jewish community. This year (as in years past), the G.A. had a problem: young Jews were not given the floor. In fact, their voices were virtually absent from discussions altogether. According to a recent article entitled "The General Assembly's Youth Deficit", the number of sessions in which young Jewish activists under the age of 35 appeared on panels could be counted on one hand.

Considering that the Jewish establishment is so concerned about Jewish continuity and about the perceived decrease in the younger generation’s Jewish affiliation, it strikes me as odd that younger Jews would not have been invited or encouraged to take on greater leadership roles at the G.A. The Jewish 20’s and 30’s scene is booming with creativity -- from blogs, to films, to art, to music, to zines, and plenty of political activism. True, we’re not all flocking to Shabbat services, becoming members of Hadassah, being poster children for the American Jewish Committee or signing up to be youth group leaders for USY or Birthright (I’m certainly not), but these affiliations do not, in my mind, encompass *the* Jewish community. Unfortunately, I don’t think the G.A. organizers have caught on to this just yet.

Who Makes the Jewish Future, a past blog entry posted by JR, speaks to a similar problem: the under-representation of women at Jewish conferences and the tokenistic pattern of inviting one Jewish woman to represent all of Jewish womanhood. This is a problem that has existed for a long, long time. Something needs to change.

The Jewish community is transforming. And if the head-honcho Jews want to think about the future, they need to understand that “doing Jewish” isn’t only about Kosher food and Hillel. There’s a whole other world out there that’s Jewish, engaged, and powerful. It’s time for the Jewish establishment to re-establish itself.

Last week, hundreds of Haredi (ultra-Orthodox) Jews rioted against the Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgender community to protest a planned Pride March in Jerusalem. Many of the Haredi rioters set fires and threw stones at GLBT community members and their supporters. The rioters also called for the deaths of the leaders of the Jerusalem Open House, a GLBT advocacy center. The prospective marchers had indicated their willingness to modify their route and to contain any explicit behavior in deference to community sensibilities. However, any public display of their identity was deemed too much for the streets of Jerusalem. Though a few of the Haredi rioters were briefly detained at a police station, none of them were publicly condemned or punished for their violent acts. As a result of the heightened violence, the march was cancelled and instead, a small contained GLBT rally took place at the Hebrew University stadium while thirty gay activists were arrested for attempting to have a spontaneous march in a public space.

To my mind, the fact that an inclusive, non-violent march celebrating GLBT identity was cancelled in order to satisfy the interests of violent, religious Jews is simply outrageous. It is inexcusable bigotry that undermines the tenets of freedom and respect in the Jewish tradition of which I am most proud.

Israel prides itself on being the only democracy in the Middle East; a pluralistic country in which all Jews and Israeli-Arabs -- secular and religious, women and men, gay and straight -- should be able to express themselves freely and live in peace. Democracy is not about appeasing the wishes of a city's religious majority or allowing those in power to feel “comfortable” as others are silenced. Nor is democracy about cultivating an ultra-Orthodox hegemony of privilege and double-standards.

Consider this: if a woman wears a tallit (a ritual prayer shawl traditionally worn by men) while praying at the Western Wall, she is not guaranteed protection from a physical assault. But if a black-hat rabbi incites violence against a lesbian by throwing stones at her, he is somehow exempt from an arrest. Why? Because he’s an ultra-Orthodox rabbi. Clearly, the Israeli public would not tolerate the same behavior from an Arab. But sadly, Haredi male privilege has become ingrained in Israeli society even though violent behavior is clearly not an expression of derech eretz (literally, “the way of the land” implying humane consideration and regard toward fellow human beings).

Jews have endured a long history of oppression. Jewish women have experienced the dual challenge of fighting both anti-Semitism and sexism in the public arena. Add a lesbian identity to the mix and the challenge becomes even harder -- anti-Semitism, sexism, and homophobia are not easy prejudices to fight all at once, especially when these prejudices are often intertwined. It’s no secret that lesbian Jews have experienced anti-Semitism in the lesbian community and have experienced homophobia in the Jewish community as well. But despite the challenges, lesbian Jews exist in large numbers and have made remarkable contributions to Jewish life -- women like Joan Nestle founder of Lesbian Herstory Archives,
Sharon Kleinbaum, rabbi of Congregation Beth Simchat Torah (a gay and lesbian synagogue in NYC), and Shulamit Izen, a GLBT Jewish youth activist who established a Gay-Straight Alliance at her Jewish Day School.

Like Nestle, I would hope that as Jewish women in touch with the richest challenges of our history, we would embrace the responsibility to speak out and assert that all people, including those in the GLBT community, have the right to live with dignity and have the right to be publicly proud. As Nestle writes: “I believe in a feminism that does not run from the full complexity of women’s lives, from the vital differences between us as well as the connections that bind us.” To yield to the Haredi standard of intolerance is to deny our own existence.

Check out JWA's exhibit "Jewish Women and the Feminist Revolution" to learn more about the ways in which Jewish women have advocated for the GLBT community.